[Kzyxtalk] Censorship

[David]

At popular request I've been working on the 7-second censorship guidebook.
Once the delay unit has been activated all concerned will be trained at
their request (or management's insistence) on how to use the 7-second delay
to obliterate a one hour public affairs program. The short version is as
follows:

 

1.	Once the program host has turned on the microphone to go on the air,
immediately press the delay button. That will keep the audience from hearing
seven seconds of questionable comments.
2.	Count to seven.

 

Then proceed as follows: 

 

3.	Press the button again.
4.	Count to seven.
5.	Press the button again.
6.	Repeat as needed. 

 

Note: 

 

: You will need to remain vigilant. 

: 59-minutes of public affairs programming will require 506 consecutive
button pushes. 

: I know that the true believers, those committed to maximizing the Big
Brother nature of this Censorship machine will keep the faith. 

: Try alternating digits. Start with the index finger, then use the thumb. 

: Others prefer to use the right index finger, then the left index finger. 

: As an option, lefties may use the left index finger first.

: (The index finger is the pointy one next to your thumb used to, oh, ah,
point to things.)

: By alternating fingers you may be able to extend your time at the button.

: Consider organizing into groups of two or more to handle 56-second shifts.


: You may wish to organize into teams of believers to alternate pushing the
button.

: Please limber up before you approach the delay unit. 

: You may wish to keep a tube of hand cream available. 

: Also, we will be placing the 73-page guidebook in the studio. In it you'll
find the long history of 7-second censorship, from Abraham Lincoln's
original 285-word Gettysburg Address (later censored to 272 words), to
Guglielmo Marconi's first foray into the 7-second machine in 1923, to the
arrest (in 1964) of William T. "Buzzy" Watson for secretly installing the
machine in the studio of KFRC to stop the Beatles from being played, and
more. It's a real page turner.

 

Keep the faith. Be strong. We can change the world, seven seconds at a time.

 

David Steffen

KZYX Business Development

(707) 895-2324 office

(707) 322-9895 cell

(707) 895-2451 fax

 

 

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